Thursday, April 28, 2016

Swan Song Thursday

It’s Thursday.
Not just any Thursday; I deem this day as Swan Song Thursday.

Tuesday was my last day teaching composition and tonight was my last night teaching speech.
I found out on Tuesday night; the two classes I was supposed to teach next week were taken away because someone deemed my four degrees, six years of teaching experience, and writing credentials unworthy of teaching 100-level undergraduate composition and speech classes. What was acceptable last week is now considered null and void.

So, I packed up the cubicle farm and after 9:00 p.m., I called it a day. I really would have liked a true swan song—at least a month’s notice to fulfill my last teaching assignments. Instead, I get bitten and the proverbial rug is pulled out from under my feet.

And then I remember, swans can be mean.
Not the people I worked with and worked for—I love my academic family. It’s not my supervisors who caused this or necessarily the main office. It’s the cold, calculated swans who believe in numbers and dollars and cents and bureaucracy. It makes absolutely no sense to me.

But, swans are unpredictable.
And so is the life of an expendable adjunct.

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

April Snow Globe

April Snow Globe

"Sometimes it snows in April." - Prince

Since April first,
this month has been
like a snowstorm;
and I have been
in a snow globe
of sorts;
I am looking
at the sky
waiting again
for the
clouds to form;
and the universe
to shake
the snow globe
once again;
and only
when I paused,
and took my eyes
off the sky,
did the snow globe
shake again.



It has been a challenging month; I will write more in detail in a future post. For now, I will rest.

Saturday, April 02, 2016


(Java and Moshi, March 2016)

(Moshi, April 2016)

sleeps sadly
dreaming of Java.

Today will be our first entire day without Java. Even though Java was a quiet cat, the house is so quiet without her. It's going to take a while to heal from yesterday. It is weird not seeing Java perched on her favorite Doctor Who blanket on the sofa, or on the bed near me. Miss Moshi, the second oldest cat, is missing Java, too. She was clinging to Steve this morning and she is now curled up next to me in bed as I write. I have learned over the years that animals grieve, too. I wish I could take the hurt away from sweet Moshi. All we can do is give her extra love and affection. We will watch for depression. The other cats seem a little confused, but are not exhibiting visible signs of grief.

Friday, April 01, 2016

Java Sigety: October 1, 1998- April 1, 2016

deafening silence
of an empty

carrier haunted
us as we

drove home
from the vet.

Our Lady Princess Java was put to sleep today after a long hard battle with kidney disease, arthritis, hyperthyroidism, and cancer. She was breathing hard this week, and we took her in today for x-rays. We were afraid of the results, and our dread was soon confirmed. We decided to do the most loving peaceful thing for her-- let her go. There were many days we weren't sure that she would come home with us, but we were a little taken off-guard that today was the day.

Steve and I adopted Java seventeen-and-a-half years ago from our friend's friend. We were only a couple years into our marriage, and we were living in a small apartment in South Bend, IN. She took a liking to our resident boy cat, Jack. Java is now with him in Heaven. Java's passing is an end of an era--she has been with us in our twenties, thirties, and mid-forties. We are grateful to have had her with us for so long.

How odd it is that today there were storms while Java was at the vet, and on our way home the sun came out while the rain abated. I think it was Java's way of telling us that she is okay, no longer in pain, and is with Jack. We love her and we will see her again someday, but wow, does it hurt.

We love you, Java. RIP, our catnip kitten.

National Lampoon's Garden Adventures, and Last Thoughts on 46

Update on Sake Sakura: We will be making an appointment to get Sake's MRI. It's been really hot and our schedules have been nuts,...